Waiter Rant: Behind the Scenes of Eating Out

"The Waiter"

Waiter Rant: Behind the Scenes of Eating Out

Most restaurant customers are nice people, but a few are socially maladjusted psychopaths who relish giving their waiters a hard time. Waiter Rant" gives the inside scoop on what really goes on behind the scenes in a restaurant, how to be a good customer and get great service and why, strangely, a waiters lifestyle is as addictive as crack cocaine. After training as a priest, working in psychiatric hospitals and nearly having a nervous breakdown, at the age of thirty, the Waiter began serving tables. Seven years later ...hes still figuring out what to do when he grows up, but has survived enough hellish shifts on the restaurant floor, smiling whilst holding burning hot plates and still smiling whilst a customer changes her order for the seventh time, to know a thing or two. His outrageous anecdotes of appalling customer behaviour show that people are at their worst when being served. Bad customers get bad service. So if you dont want your waiter to spit in your food, give you the table next to the toilets on Valentines Day the Waiter suggests you follow a few customer rules. 2.8 out of 5 based on 4 reviews
Waiter Rant: Behind the Scenes of Eating Out

Omniscore:

Classification Non-fiction
Genre Humour, Food & Drink
Format Paperback
Pages 320
RRP £12.99
Date of Publication August 2008
ISBN 978-1848540071
Publisher John Murrary
 

Most restaurant customers are nice people, but a few are socially maladjusted psychopaths who relish giving their waiters a hard time. Waiter Rant" gives the inside scoop on what really goes on behind the scenes in a restaurant, how to be a good customer and get great service and why, strangely, a waiters lifestyle is as addictive as crack cocaine. After training as a priest, working in psychiatric hospitals and nearly having a nervous breakdown, at the age of thirty, the Waiter began serving tables. Seven years later ...hes still figuring out what to do when he grows up, but has survived enough hellish shifts on the restaurant floor, smiling whilst holding burning hot plates and still smiling whilst a customer changes her order for the seventh time, to know a thing or two. His outrageous anecdotes of appalling customer behaviour show that people are at their worst when being served. Bad customers get bad service. So if you dont want your waiter to spit in your food, give you the table next to the toilets on Valentines Day the Waiter suggests you follow a few customer rules.

Reviews

The Daily Telegraph

Paul Levy

Tempted though I am to say he is a likeable, humane, educated version of Anthony Bourdain, unlike the swaggering former chef, the anonymous author of Waiter Rant can actually write... The flip side of being a decent bloke is that our waiter is sometimes sentimental. Someone needs to tell him that "aggravated" does not mean annoyed or irritated, and that most of his customers are the "foodies" he traduces. But the 200-word tutorial on ordering wine in a restaurant is spot-on, and I agree with him that grappa is "Italian lighter fluid.

16/08/2008

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The Washington Post

Jonathan Yardley

On the matter of tipping, with which he's unsurprisingly obsessed, one complaint: He doesn't seem to understand that the customer has the right to adjust the tip to the quality of service rather than automatically shell out 18-20 percent. He also doesn't seem to understand that customers are more interested in waiters as servers than as friends, and that the Hi-I'm-Steve-and-I'll-be-your-server-tonight routine is not universally beloved. Otherwise, though, Waiter Rant is as delightful as it is irreverent.

10/08/2008

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The Los Angeles Times

Erika Schickel

Where [Anthony] Bourdain's prose is a spicy gumbo, Dublanica's is as cool and clear as aspic. A tasty medium but ultimately not very filling. The difference is passion -- Bourdain loves his work, Dublanica most decidedly does not. Bourdain writes because he's a writer, Dublanica writes to escape the boredom of waiting tables... All would be forgiven if he were laugh-out-loud funny, but, though it is very chuckle-worthy, the book never crosses into belly laughs... The Waiter's inward despair lends emotional ballast to what otherwise might float off into the thin air of the purely anecdotal. But at the same time, it's a little creepy.

13/08/2008

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Scotland on Sunday

Richard Bath

Waiter Rant reads like its author has speed-read all the available classics and distilled every facet that made them bestsellers. Drink and drugs? Yep, ticked that box. Sex and peeing in customers' wine? Yep, ticked that too. He doesn't even do writing by numbers competently, thanks to a pretentiously convoluted use of language: a customer isn't pulling-her-hair-out angry but "trichotillomaniac"; a fellow waiter isn't reclusive but "eremitical"; A Waiter doesn't redress faults, he "remediates" them. Me? I'm just left feeling a little ennuiated by it all.

17/08/2008

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